It is a look of having seen a lot… too much perhaps to be able to be a part of polite society, too much and too deep and too far that it separates you from most of humankind.
It is a wild look, one of being completely present yet at the same time in some far-off place.
Most of us will not have this look, it is a rare breed that goes to the depths of the Soul, of their Soul… and the type of knowledge and understandings that come from entering a place like this are for the rare individual, the called individual… and these types will be the first to tell you that there is a certain depth you can go to that may, perhaps, be too deep.
But many of us on our spiritual path will have come across spiritual doors.
What is a spiritual door you may ask? It is a concept, and occasionally a reality. It is the idea that we come across certain precipices on our spiritual path, certain thresholds. And at that precipice is a spiritual door.
For some of us it is a choice to walk through that spiritual door. For others we may be shoved in.
The concept of the spiritual door at first glance is seemingly simple. It is a threshold, and if we step through that door our understanding of ourselves and the world will change. We may have a new perspective, let go of old emotions and understandings. We may also gain new abilities or skills.
The difficulty of a spiritual door is that once gone through you can never go back. Although this is a sort of dire statement to make, it is true. Once you go through a spiritual door your understandings and perhaps your capabilities in this world will change. This means that even if you were to go back to your old life, who you were before this sort of mini-death, you would still have the knowledge, understandings, and capabilities that were granted to you by your passage through this threshold.
At first our spiritual doors are frequently about ourselves going beyond our own limitations. The only person stopping us from proceeding is ourselves– our own beliefs, what we know to be true of the world, what we know to be true of ourselves. We must surrender to deepening– to going beyond what we know to deepen our experience of this world and understandings of ourselves… what we hold to be true must change.
Many of us wait at the precipice of this spiritual door, uncertain of if we should go through… understanding that if we do enter, our lives will change. And we may know we need to change, we may really want to deepen our spiritual path, to heal, or to move forward in our lives. But there is a battle– between what is know, what is comfortable and fear, the unknown.
If we are to surrender, to let go of our fear, we can move beyond our personal barriers and into our own deeper spiritual truths.
But the spiritual door is more than a concept. It certainly is always a personal initation, a sort of test to see if we can proceed, if we are willing to.
But in the spiritual realms there are actual doors that we can pass through. It is more than a metaphor, it is the entry into a spiritual realm, a universe, a going beyond the depths of our own personal demons and fears and into the collective.
For these doors there may be guardians. There may be tests. We may be required to prove our worth before entry.
It is a strange concept, because in the modern-day spiritual concept of the Universe we can interact with anything supposedly. If we want to interact with Zeus, or an elf or a parallel universe we are told we just need the correct technique, or series of techniques.
I make a big fuss about self-created vs. actual spiritual realms because there is more than ourselves out there. If we consider ourselves on a shamanic path or any sort of spiritual path it goes beyond psychology and self-creation. If we are at the point of depth in our spiritual path where we are interacting with more than our own disassociated aspects of self, we will find spiritual doors. These will allow for us to go deeper into understanding what can be considered truth. Of not only our own personal truth but the energies that make up the Universe, the cosmos, the world…
And seeing these depths is not granted simply because we may feel entitled to them. We must pass through a spiritual door to do so. A door that is not guarded by a fragment of our own psyche, but of an actual spirit or being.
In many cases it is our choice to go through these types of spiritual doors, to take part in the initiation process, the testing and proving of worth that we are ready to know more than we do now. There are specific ceremonies throughout history in varying spiritual traditions that have allowed for people passage through these precipices.
In many cases we may not realize that we are at this precipice, and be uncertain of what we need to do to walk through this door. We also may be resisting, or warring within ourselves about whether we wish to deepen our experiences of ourselves or this world.
Walking through these spiritual doors often does not set us free, and this expanded perspective of our own truth or spiritual truth(s)… this deepening… can be a burden, resulting in isolation or simply being an outlier in a society that does not accept or understand those who have had spiritual experiences that go beyond a certain point.
But whether it is a spiritual door of our own creation– our own restrictions and beliefs not allowing for us to gain greater access to who we truly are– or if it is an external spiritual door granting us access to another realm or greater spiritual truth– the effect is always the same.
We understand, we know, we realize more than we did. And this can radically change our lives, it can radically deepen our experiences of this world. But it can also be a burden. Choose thoughtfully and carefully how far you wish to go on your path. There are depths and doors that once entered cannot be gone back from.