Hi Mary-

I am curious about your thoughts re: the “everyone is psychic” debate. I have been psychic all my life passed down from my grandmother. I get annoyed by people who say everyone is psychic. I get double annoyed at people who aren’t psychic at all and go to some random school and get “certified” as a clairvoyant or medium or something. I just don’t think that things work like that. I get annoyed they don’t understand the actual struggles of people like me. What about you?

– A Real Psychic

Hi A Real Psychic-

I totally get where you are coming from and have been there. It seems that when I had the most difficulties with my sensitivities is when I would be confronted by these types of people. There was one woman repeatedly in some of my bodywork classes who would announce that she was a certified Clairvoyant with this huge smile on her face. At the time I was really angry with my abilities and I just wanted to scream at her that if she saw 1/10th of what I did she would likely be cowering in a corner. I found that the less difficulty that I had with myself concerning my sensitivities the less anger, annoyance, grief, difficulty (insert emotion here) I had towards these types of people. I understand that to someone who is highly psychic, though, these types can be annoying and inspire a huge range of emotions. I would suggest to you that you take a look at what emotions come up when confronted with these “certified” folks or the folks who talk about how psychic they are… these are things that you can heal within yourself.

When you can look at these types of people and see that they are wounded and in a type of spiritual kindergarten you will begin to understand them better. The old saying “the grass is always greener” certainly applies. One of my teachers used to say that everyone wants a spiritual experience until they have one… I have certainly found this to be true with psychic abilities as well. It is difficult to be psychic/sensitive. It is especially difficult if you do not know how to work with your abilities with the appropriate tools. It is even more difficult when the popular culture at large wants to be Psychic in 6 Easy Steps or the least sensitive person you have ever met has likely gone to psychic school and announces they are psychic to every person they meet. These types of people will never understand what being highly sensitive or psychic means. That is okay. Let them pretend.

The only level that this is harmful is when they go into business, which is an entirely different subject. One of my callings is to help fix the work of other spiritual providers so it is a bit of a sore point for me when psychics and spiritual healers who are not naturally talented or are minimally capable take on work beyond their paygrade, so to speak. This can really, really, really screw people up. Luckily, with most psychics the worst they typically do is give bad readings and bad guidance from this ego-driven place of confidence. This can screw people up, certainly, but not in the same way fake or minimally talented spiritual providers can with their healing work. Anyway, I digress…

Build yourself up, heal yourself, work on you… I am at a point where I am either amused by these types or am able to see what inner wounds have caused them to want to be “psychic”. It usually is about lack of personal power and difficulties with control, but that is a topic for a different day. I now simply notice them, say something like “that is interesting” if they are directly telling me how psychic they are and how special that makes them, and do not engage with them. This is a valid approach for in-person and online. It is not up to you to get someone to graduate from spiritual kindergarten. If you are highly psychic/sensitive, you know that having spiritual experiences and being sensitive is much different than popular culture shows. You likely know that the highly sensitive/psychic person has to deal with a huge amount of stuff on a daily basis that would cause most people to go insane. Be proud of your struggle, be proud of who you are, commend yourself on what you deal with successfully on a daily basis. Focus on you. When you know who you are you will see others as they are. They still might annoy you, but you will be able to see them with more compassion and you will not have that charge of negative , harmful emotion in interacting with people like this. In fact, as you heal your own wounds regarding your psychic abilities the amount of people you run across like this will decrease.

As far as the “Everyone is Psychic” debate my answer is sure, why not… I do think that anyone can become more sensitive than they are right now. If a person chooses to put effort into it, sure, they can become more “psychic” than they were before. In fact, I think that everyone should meditate and heal their issues and become more sensitive. This would start to take care of the huge communal shadow that we all have to deal with from all of our personal shadows co-mingling. That being said, most people when they become more sensitive are not highly or even medium range psychic. They simply are more psychic than they were before. Most highly sensitive people have either genetic predisposition or a huge amount of early childhood trauma (really highly psychic people often have both) that has created their sensitivities. There is a biological imperative on some level that they notice more of the stimuli that surrounds them. Can someone become more sensitive? Sure. Is someone going to be as highly psychic as that genetically predisposed person? No. I could go on about spiritual materialism and how we think that we can simply buy anything spiritual, spiritual bypass issues (becoming spiritual in an effort to not deal with the physical world and ordinary everyday life) and how in our culture people want to be anything other than themselves, but I will stop.

My short answer to this endless debate is that everyone can become more psychic or sensitive than they are right now. Someone who goes into a room and only notices 20 points of stimuli isn’t going to suddenly go into a room and notice 2,000 points of stimuli, no matter how many courses they take, no matter how books they buy, no matter how much they want to be psychic. This cultural focus on “opening the third eye” or “decalcifying the pineal gland” when most people could use basic grounding and a basic meditation practice (which would gradually make the person more sensitive) shows how in our culture we want to be advanced, certified, ahead of everyone else yesterday. If someone really wants to be more psychic I suggest meditation. For many years. You will naturally become grounded, more sensitive/psychic than you are right now, and maintain balance. In fact, one of the ways that I can tell if someone is highly psychic is that they tell me how much self-hatred and/or difficulties they have had at some point in their lives due to their sensitivities/psychic abilities. The person with actual psychic abilities struggles seeing them as not being a curse. The non-psychic wants to purchase them to convince others that they are powerful and will think they are wonderful. Hope that answers your questions, A Real Psychic.

Interested in submitting to the Spiritual Advice column? Contact me here with the heading “Spiritual Advice”. Please note that I am not an allopathic physician or psychiatrist, and my advice is not intended as substitution for the advice of those professionals. I reserve the right to edit emails for clarity.

Mary Shutan L.Ac, CST-D, CZB, ABT offers readings, services and programs for people undergoing Spiritual Awakening issues, including Kundalini syndrome, as well as for people dealing with psychic abilities. You may contact her to set up a consultation for an appointment or go here for information on readings.