money and spirituality

Money and Spirituality… Again

So in the continuation of “popular emails I receive” I will again answer a common one, and will attempt to do so compassionately:

Hi Mary, I am a seeker & I don’t want to seek from you what/how my future will be… & I don’t want to buy spirituality.

My question to you “why are you selling God’s given gift??”

“Is the purpose of Kundalini Awakening in you is to sell its benefits for a price?”

With Regards,

A Seeker

To A Seeker:

I will attempt to answer this question compassionately, even though your intent was to chastise, belittle, and judge me. I get this question a few times a week, so I thought I would answer it rather than delete it, which is what I normally do.

This is the last time I will answer this question, or talk about money (except in perhaps a more esoteric way) because I am tired of it, quite frankly, and this is never an issue about me, it is always about the person and their unresolved trauma and issues around money… and until the person decides to take a look within and take personal responsibility for their issues, they will never be able to even fully read the rest of my response and process it.

It is also true that the intent of questions like these are always tiring– this response is not to spread love, compassion, or good in the world. It is in popular parlance, to be a “troll”. It is an attempt to get me to see you are “right” and that the whole world, the whole universe, should ascribe to your specific brand of spirituality, your own ethics, thoughts on the universe, and your own path. It is an attempt to feel superior to me, because you likely feel inferior to yourself. And I don’t care what you think about me, I do not know you, and when you realize that the opinions of others are as illusory as anything and are simply reflective of their own traumas you typically let this shit go… unless you care about the person and/or respect them or their thoughts. And that is a small group of people to me, quite frankly.

And anyone who cannot see beyond themselves to the point of having compassion for others and respecting their decisions, whatever they might be (even if you personally consider them “wrong”) has not awakened. Simple as that. 

Awakening, even a small amount of awakening, allows for you to see that the world doesn’t need to revolve around you, and in fact you are an infinitesimally small part of the Universe who doesn’t matter that much.

Until people “wake up” to a certain point they believe that the world has to revolve around them, what they have been taught– their own brand of judgements, religious path, spiritual path. It is everything that is wrong with the world today, quite frankly. It shows that the person lacks the capacity or ability to look within themselves to resolve issues that they have with the outer world. It is a basic lack of recognition that in most people, what they see “outer” and their problems with the “outer” world are actually issues within themselves.

This actually changes at a certain point, but not before you get beyond your own conditioning, your own issues, and your own judgements. Until then, everything you are reacting to is an issue that needs to be resolved within yourself.

Once you get to a certain point you begin to realize that people are where they are. You begin to have compassion for them, and their constricted world view, and the amount of anger and fear they must have to not only bring such negativity into the world, but to seek to send it out to others.

If you were to only look inside of yourself, “seeker”, you would see that this issue is not about money, and it isn’t even about me. It is about you, and something that can and should be reconciled within. Except you are not ready to do that, and that is fine… you will likely continue “seeking” on your self-righteous path, judging and sending brutal negativity into the world to anything that you view as not “you”– anyone that is acting in a way that you do not personally agree with.

You will likely continue to quote from religious or spiritual texts, or whomever your teacher or guru is, never having a direct experience of spirituality. And that makes me sad. It makes me sad to think of the thousands and millions of people who do this, and never get to feel a direct, palpable sense of being connected to their greater spiritual nature, to oneness, and to the type of energy that will tell you that everything is okay, and that you do not need to turn your anger and fear outward, that will fill those empty lonely places within that cause people like this to act blindly like this, trying again and again to send their negativity and drama and chaos outward.. and that everything is part of divinity– from money to the most esoteric spiritual concepts.

So I hope that you do find that someday, “seeker”, I really do. Because until then you are just going to continue to lash out at the world, lonely, depressed, never sure why you can’t fill yourself up, continually convinced that your constricted world view is what is right and judging anyone who does not live up to your standards… which likely includes you, by the way… it is in fact really difficult to live up to our own illusory standards, and if we look within we will realize that the standards we set for others we are not meeting ourselves and this is why we feel so angry and afraid and in a state of despair… and this type of energy will never allow for you to be “sought”, to be comfortable, to come to the end of your journey.

Telling people what to do is the least “spiritual” thing that you can do with yourself. Whether it be what diet to eat, what god to worship, or how to make a living, judging people (especially to the extent that you have the need to email them in a confrontational way) is one of the least enlightened things anyone can do.

What you are doing is attempting to steal my power. And I do not give my power away or let others take it.

Let me explain. When someone purposefully sends you the energy of judgement, combined with their thoughts and negativities aimed at you, they are doing this to steal your power. This happens all the time– from message boards on the internet to this person contacting me.

A lot of people are willing to give away their power. And this temporarily fills you up, “seeker”. But it is not your power, so it always dissipates and leaves you feeling empty again. So you need to lash out again, looking for more power to steal. And if you were only to heal yourself, to learn how to develop your own power, you wouldn’t need anyone else’s. You wouldn’t need to act the way you do, quite simply.

By the way, this type of negativity and animosity, the types of energies and thoughtforms that this creates… are much worse that whatever you are judging. The irony here is that this person is seeking to be superior (and often people who send this sort of stuff either quote gurus or will talk about their high “vibration” and/or how shamans don’t accept money, which is completely a myth). You are judging someone for eating meat, worshiping the wrong god, making a living, not acting like you are (even though people who make such judgements are, again, never “awakened” or even more importantly, happy with themselves or their lives). This type of energy that you are sending, that you are likely unaware of, is amplifying the unhappiness, the pain that causes people like you to send such notes. 

In fact, you likely do not realize that it is increasing it. People like this rarely realize that the brutal negativity and judgement they send out (that they hope will land on anyone other than themselves so they don’t actually have to examine anything internally) increases and is sent back to them. They are devolving their karma, their vibration, their own happiness, and are stagnating themselves on their spiritual path, likely for a long time, if not for many lifetimes.

If you are happy with yourself, if you are happy with your path, if you have truly found God or whatever you are seeking, you will have no need for this.

Again, people are where they are. And we can have compassion for them, even if they are someone who is seeking to stick their cords and energetic tentacles and negativity onto anyone out there so they don’t have to deal with their own heap of unprocessed trauma and darkness, even someone who is attempting to steal power from you, even terrorists and murderers and people who enjoy cheese or meat or do not worship the “correct” god. We can all realize that they are simply people, people so far into despair and negativity and chaos that all they can do is lash out.

And people are doing the best they can, or the best they think they can. And in an unhealed state, it is so much easier to lash out than to look within and heal. And people will just keep on repeating the same loop of unhealed behaviors, the same patterns, often blind to the fact that they can do anything about them, often blind to the fact that the problem is them, not the outer manifestation in the physical world.

And healed people do not act like this. They just don’t. They have no need to.

So, seeker, I am going to answer your original question. Why do I accept money?

Because my God, my spirits, my connection to divinity told me that this was my path. In fact, if you knew anything about the call to be a spiritual worker, you would understand that I cannot do anything else for a living. I have tried. Once you get a call to do something like this you cannot be an accountant (nothing against accountants, I love my accountant and actually think he was called to be an accountant). My path has allowed for me to do this full time because it is my calling, and who am I to question my calling? And more importantly, who are you to? If you think that you are greater than my calling, or you should tell me what my calling is and how and what I should do with it… again, you are welcome to do so. But I would suggest questioning the presumptuous and ego-driven nature, the unawakened nature, that would do so, that would seek to question the spiritual path of anyone, the spiritual calling of anyone, especially of someone you have never met or even interacted with before.

Because we are not just spiritual, we are physical. I do this work 24/7, 365. It is my job. If I were an accountant, I would not be able to work with people all day spiritually. Divinity has directly corralled me (not always so gently) to do my work as ethically as I am able to as well as has provided for my rent and my daily needs. And nobody who is a spiritual worker gets rich (well, very rarely, but they typically aren’t doing spiritual work, they are teachers who don’t see clients). The physical and the spiritual are equally important. We are spiritual in physical bodies for a reason, and we need food and shelter, no matter how “spiritual” we are.

This world desperately needs spiritual workers. Spiritual workers who have the capacity to devote their entire life to this work. Spiritual workers who know what they are doing, who have dealt with enough of their own stuff to be of service to others. And this capacity and willingness on the part of the individual to basically have their entire life cater around spiritual work is rare. Very rare. And this world (again) desperately needs people who don’t do this on weekends for fun, who actually can contact the spiritual realms (and not just self-create or work mentally), who have developed their skills over many, many years, and who are beyond the sort of tiring repeated ideologies such as this one.

This is why we have so many people out there like this “seeker”– who have a divide between what is “spiritual” and what is “not” with money solely being in the “not-divine, evil, dark” etc corner of things.

Because money isn’t evil, and money is as divine as anything. Anyone who asks this question has an issue with money. Money is simply a thing. It is neither good nor bad. It just simply is. If you think that money is evil, or that someone is evil for charging, whether they be a spiritual worker or a plumber, that has to do with you, not with anything outer, not with the person you are seeking to chastise or judge. You.

So this is the last time that I will respond to something like this, because quite frankly, it is a stupid question, and I have better things to spend my time on. People who ask this always have the same anger, the same fear, the same issues. While I am compassionate towards it, it makes me tired… as tired as the continual “what is a shaman” questions, as tired as people endlessly quoting their teachers and books and religious texts without having any insight or direct experience of their own.

I am over it, and hope that others who read this blog will consider their relationship and judgement around money, and realize that it is something they can resolve within themselves to great effect on their outer lives… and that the type of judgement and negativity that are created by people like this always is called back to them, thus making them more angry, judgmental, and negative.

Think about this the next time you are judging someone– if your negativity and thoughts are in fact worse than whatever you are judging them for.

The world needs people who can rise above this type of thinking, who can realize that it is okay if people don’t act, think, or believe in the same way they do.

And most importantly, we need to stop sending brutal negativity, judgement, and division into the world. We are at a tipping point in this world energetically, and we can take personal responsibility for ourselves, our thoughts, and our own healing process… or we can continue to put things outer into the world because we do not want to personally deal with them… thus creating and causing the type of collective brutal energies that result in global chaos like we are seeing now.

Most people have huge cultural issues, family issues, ancestral issues, and personal issues with money. It is a relationship that lies unawakened within themselves, unresolved within themselves. It is so easy to put this on other people, and to have some romanticized idea based on your own issues, your own unexamined traumas, and to put those outward onto other people. It is much harder to look at yourself and reconcile within yourself that money is just a thing, like all physical things are things. It is not important, and although it matters quite a bit in the physical world and there is a huge amount of issues concerning hoarding of money, scarcity,and anyone can tell you how difficult life can be when you do not have money to pay the rent… in terms of its spiritual nature money is as divine as whatever spiritual concept is out there, and we can realize that and transcend this type of tiring thinking and repeated behavior.

Spiritual Trends and Minimalism

Every once in a while a new spiritual trend emerges. Books, news pieces, memes, and public figures/gurus all emerge to center around this trend (and to capitalize nicely off of it) until the trend dies down much like the newest sneaker that was once all the rage becoming out of season.

Recently, this trend has been minimalism. I am sure you have seen this– people with tiny houses, memes upon stories upon memes of minimalist sayings, and people emerging out of the woodwork who will happily teach you, sell you, or otherwise convince you to give them money so they can too help you become minimalist.

It should go without saying (but unfortunately I have to say this) that thinking critically about something is not the same is thinking that thing is “bad”. We can love something, or even do such things ourselves and have positive results in our lives, and still want to look deeper… still want to look at the patterns of things. For many, unfortunately, thinking critically means that you are negative, upset, or don’t like something. Fortunately most people who read my blogs are beyond such polarities of criticism/negative/dark/bad and positivity/forced cheerfulness/head in the sand/light/good.

That all being said, minimalism is not a bad thing. We all have a lot of stuff (well, most of us do) so the new trend of minimalism is helpful. It can allow for us to look at our lives, look at our individual materialism, and really ask if we need what we own… and to question how much we need to shop and what we in fact need in our lives as material objects.

But there is something artificial about this trend, and about all spiritual trends. 

When a trend like this emerges, products and people come forward to be its spokespeople or figureheads. Then “regular” people– anyone from college students to life coaches to professionals begin to teach and sell others things in accordance to this trend. I have no issue for people charging for their time (and am not a new-ager in the illusory thinking that because it is spiritual it should be free because otherwise it is tainted) and very much think that people should charge what they, and their services, are worth. But the selling of these trends is often antithetical to the actual message of the trend. 

If we were to look at minimalism, the message is about less. Since this has filtered down to public mass consciousness, this trend has become about less material goods. Less clothing, less space to live in, and so forth. But the true call to minimalism is about less all around. This is a subtle differentiation, but it is important. This will become clearer when the other aspects are discussed more.

Spiritual trends are simply byproducts of the spiritual awakening process that are misunderstood and filtered randomly (or not so randomly) into public consciousness.

When we begin to awaken, we naturally embrace minimalism. We will naturally look around at what is surrounding us and realize that our physical bodies, our physical material belongings are not as important to us as they once were. It is a natural part of the awakening process to slough off our old selves, to let go of the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of ourselves that are blocking who we truly are. Quite simply, it is part of awakening to let go of a wide variety of things, including material belongings, and to become less materialistic in general. It just doesn’t matter as much as it once did, and clearing space in our lives often involves actually physically having a clear space in our house.

But it isn’t yet another thing for us to put on our “to do” lists. 

Minimalism in the spiritual awakening process naturally happens. It isn’t something that we need gurus or to be taught about. It is something that arises out of our own realizations and direct experience of looking around and seeing that we have too much stuff, or that we don’t need all that we have. It may actually be a bit unnerving to realize that all of this stuff doesn’t matter, or that the material world has lost significance for us for the most part.

When it naturally arises it naturally happens. When minimalism is presented as a spiritual trend it becomes something that you need to purchase things for, attend classes for, look through catalogues about. It becomes yet another something to do, yet another something that we have to do in our hectic lives full of “to do’s”. It causes us stress to become minimalist because on some level we realize that we can never be the perfect “doer” of this new trend.

More than this, spiritual trends become about spiritual competition. We have all likely seen the person living in the 400 square foot mini-house with their two kids and dog, or stories about throwing out the food in our fridges or having a wardrobe of only five shirts, five pants, and so on. We will never become the “best” minimalist, and the spiritual trend because it is not a natural byproduct of the awakening process and has become commoditized is about competition and who can do it best. When we are not awakening, we are still in the loops of competition with one another (even about something like minimalism) and we will always fail because we will never live up to the minimalist gurus/teachers and magazines who are espousing this new trend. We may, in fact, hate ourselves, because we are unwilling to give up some of our wardrobe or because we like our house the way it is.

We may, in fact, be talking about minimalism and how great it is and how we have purchased items x, y, and z without realizing the irony of the fact that we have purchased items for it and that we are speaking in such a way that we are being spiritually competitive with our friends, our neighbors, and our family. We may in fact go the opposite way and force the issue, creating havoc in our homes because we are blindly and unthinkingly causing discord in our families because we are following the newest spiritual fad.

Spirituality is about direct experience. It is about realizing how to be peaceful and happy, how to feel like we are enough and have enough. It is about aligning ourselves to who we really are and to our higher selves, as well as aligning ourselves in accordance to greater flows of divinity outside of ourselves. Spiritual trends are the opposite of this. They are a spiritual byproduct that has been mangled and misappropriated until it becomes a list of rules and products for mass consumerism. Rather than considering the individual and what would make their lives happy and whole, spiritual trends create illusory spiritual lists, rules, and ways of being that must be abided by if you are truly going to be “spiritual”.

Awakening is freedom. It is realizing what works for us and who we are as individuals. On a more mundane level, it is an individualized decision of what material objects we need in our lives. When we awaken we may decide that we don’t need as much stuff. We may sell, give away, or get rid of much of our material goods. But that is based on an internal guidance and a sort of spiritual compulsion to let go of things that no longer represent who we vitally are as people. And we may choose to keep many of our items… the ones that keep us happy, even if we do not necessarily “need” them. Awakening is not a contest, it is not a set of rules, and it is not a trend. It is realizing who you are and acting from the place of who you are. This may mean letting go of a lot of things, material goods included. It may not.

But minimalism is a natural process when it does happen, and it is a freeing process, not one of illusory rules, competition to see who can become the most minimal, guides/gurus, courses, books and catalogues selling us this trend. It is not something to be excited about and then left the next time the new spiritual trend comes out. What we own is a natural extension of who we are, and it is less stressful generally to have less things. But we may really like some things. And that is okay. Because we are individuals, and we do not need to compare ourselves to others.

Once we rise above group think and collective consciousness we can realize these trends and how they have turned something generally positive (freeing ourselves from the mindset of physical materialism) into yet another thing to do, yet another thing that we will not be as good at as the dude who bought the 400 square foot home, into yet another trend that we will be interested in and that will then fall away as all trends do, leaving ourselves ironically with books, teachings, and the remnants of what we bought when we were engaged in the trend of minimalism.

There are many spiritual trends that come and go… and there are many loops, or repeated behaviors, that remain year after year, decade after decade. There are also many spiritual byproducts in the path to awakening. Minimalism is one… or more correctly, freeing ourselves from many layers, including the physical, often occurs. Psychic abilities are a huge one that is a natural byproduct of the awakening process that we have commoditized and warped to the extent that most people do not even realize that they are part of the spiritual awakening process and naturally happen the more awake we are.

We really love to believe that we can purchase spiritual things (even ironically minimalism) because we have not yet risen out of the understanding that spirituality isn’t something else to do, to jam into our already packed lives. Spiritual understandings and spiritual actions are not intended to be chores and they are not intended to be part of the odd materialistic competition we have with one another (also ironically these people will often espouse oneness while doing this). Spirituality is freedom. It is understanding who we are, and when who we are naturally arises, we do what we need to– physically (materially), emotionally, mentally, and spiritually– without the external world and all of its illusions causing us to participate in a pale glimmer of what actual spiritual processes are.

So consider the world you live in, consider what you want to do with yourselves… what would make you free, happy, and totally who you are. Minimalism or the latest spiritual trend may be perfect for you. But even so, you can follow your own internal directives to how you want to implement it into your life. And it doesn’t need to cause more stress, anger, or confusion in your life. It doesn’t need to create more ways for you to do instead of to be, for you to ignore that internal call… to block that internal call by grasping at more external information, for the latest guru, book, or trend that tells us how we are intended to be spiritual. We can break free from that, and truly learn who we are, and let go of all of the spiritual competitiveness, all of the trends that tell us who we need to be and what we need to do, all of the “to do’s” that we can never accomplish and so are never good enough, and simply be who we are. And act from the place of who we are. Even if that involves keeping those pants you haven’t fit in since 1995.

If you wish to contact me or have inquiries about sessions, spiritual healing work, or my three or six month distance email program, you are welcome to here.

Selling Enlightenment: The Commoditization of Kundalini and Spiritual Awakening

Recently someone sent me an article about someone who had had a supposed Kundalini awakening and was now selling courses to teach people how to become “enlightened”. This sort of sales pitch is far from rare. I regularly see or get sent literature, websites, and articles about kundalini, spiritual awakening, enlightenment, or really anything spiritual for sale.

I do think that it is wonderful that people want to become more aware, more in tune with their spiritual side. If each one of us could awaken to the point of holding multiple perspectives– meaning that not only our perspective but that of someone much different than us– as both being valid and true, this world would be a much, much better place.

Just in case you have not read my other blogs, I personally operate under the realization that we all are awakened or enlightened. We just do not remember or realize this… and we have layers and layers of conditioning, trauma, and belief systems on top of that awakened state. So I am not suggesting that if you have had a Kundalini awakening you are a member of some super secret club… but true Kundalini awakenings are rare. The ability to remove or have multiple layers of conditioned reality removed within a single lifetime is really rare.

Most of the people that I see selling enlightenment are not enlightened themselves. They have not had Kundalini awakenings or another awakening to the extent that they have gone beyond the lower layers of understanding– meaning going beyond the Self. All of the material I have seen from people selling kundalini, spiritual awakening, and so forth, are from people who have had a few spiritual experiences (maybe even a singular kundalini experience and not a full awakening) who do not realize what a kundalini awakening actually is, or what awakening really is like.

I realize that in some ways this sounds a bit harsh. But anyone who has truly experienced a spiritual awakening of any sort realizes that you can do all the mantras, hypnotherapy, meditation, yoga, read all the books, and visit whatever workshops, gurus, teachers you like and the end result for you and the person sitting next to you in said workshop is going to be entirely different. I used to go to workshops and wonder why the person who came up to me making sure that they told me how they had taken years of teachings or followed certain gurus or teachers around for decades were still so traumatized and still needed to be so spiritually competitive. There is a reason for that, I found out later.

This is because awakening is a multi-lifetime process, and it is something that is not in our individual control. Once you get beyond the “Self”– meaning our direct experience of life (this is typically where most people who commoditize spiritual awakening are), we begin to process the layers of family, ancestors, and past lives- meaning the beliefs and traumas that we have been given to us through them. We then leave the Self and process societal energies, world energies, archetypes, thoughtforms… all the stuff that is communally created. When those layers lift we discover that the world is simply in a sort of cosmic flow. When you experience the cosmic flow state you realize that things like spiritual awakening are intended to happen within an individuals lifetime. Or they are not. And no guru, teacher, Oprah show, or the like is going to awaken you if you are not intended to awaken.

People really do not like to hear what I wrote in the last paragraph. We are used to living in an aspirational, goal-oriented world, and the idea that we cannot have something even if we really want it, and we want it now, causes our egos to throw tantrums like a two year old. There is a reason why so much aspirational material is out there– we want to be shamans, enlightened, have our kundalini awakened. We want to buy it. We are spiritually competitive– we want to be more awake and more enlightened than the person sitting next to us. We would prefer that it be easy, and that we do not have to do much work (certainly not lifetimes of work) and that the end result is us being a multi-millionaire.

We create a whole huge mythology around “if we were only enlightened our lives would be perfect.” And the people who are selling enlightenment are only too happy to oblige by wearing a mask of enlightenment, repeating memes and meaningless phrases that superficially sound good to anyone who cannot see through them. This creates a vicious circle of false enlightenment, where people go around congratulating one another on how enlightened they are, or follow and copy a teacher who is saying they are enlightened and promises enlightenment… meanwhile the teacher is typically miserable because they are typically stuck in a specific phase of awakening and cannot humble themselves to ask for help because then they would not be “enlightened” to their followers, and the followers can never be enlightened like their teacher/guru because that enlightenment is an illusion perpetrated by the teacher.

We can only come to a certain point with our teachers and healers– the point they are at personally. This means that if they are still stuck at the layers of the Self, even if they are presenting an illusion that they are not, they will not be able to guide anyone past those layers. Someone who had a single kundalini experience (a one or two time experience of the energy) will not be able to guide someone who is having a full kundalini awakening. Someone who is an aspirational shaman teacher will not be able to provide much for someone called spiritually through multiple generations to be a spiritual healer. And this is unfortunate, as people truly having these awakenings have to go through a lot of b.s. in order to find someone that can actually help them and find material that is not ego-based, aspirational, spiritually competitive and by someone that has actually had or understands these experiences.

In fact we may have spiritual experiences and ignore all facts to the contrary (or simply not know/be educated enough to know) that we have had a profound spiritual experience according to our own direct experience of spirituality… but that it is not in fact enlightenment, kundalini awakening, or so on. Direct experience is tricky, and kundalini has become a bit of a buzz word to the extent that it is rare that people actually in our modern culture know what it is. But kundalini has specific symptoms, phases, and experiences that are really easy to spot. Most of our culture is so filled with aspirational information and people who really want to believe that they experienced (or are experiencing) kundalini that what kundalini actually is has been lost.

As a side note, I get contacted by many people, and as I mentioned Kundalini awakenings are very easy to spot. Basically they are like having a huge fireball in your energy field (this happens even if you do not have a heat-oriented Kundalini awakening). I have regularly had people contact me who are powerful channels, high-level empaths, and/or have a variety of beautiful, special gifts that could be nurtured and developed to profound effect. But some of them really want to believe they are experiencing Kundalini– because it has entered our cultural grids (those middle layers I talked about) as the most intense, advanced, spiritual experience, and fulfills the cultural need for ego-based spiritual competition. Kundalini awakenings are quite intense, by the way. They are certainly not the only intense spiritual experience… they are just the only one people know about. Some of them have disregarded anything I had to say to them about what kundalini is, what a kundalini awakening actually looks like and feels like, because they wanted to believe that they had or were experiencing one. The irony of this, of course, is that their awakenings (if they were willing to understand what was going on) were beautiful, and wonderful, and meant specifically for them. But most of them will not continue awakening because they prefer the illusion.

There is a huge mythology in the “awakening” community that enlightenment is the end point, the peak experience, the most “advanced” you can be. It is sold as such– that once you do become awakened your life will be perfect, you will be rich, beautiful, and svelte. Becoming awakened is actually the end… the end of seeking… but it is the beginning of true understanding. No matter how “awakened” you are, how far and wide kundalini flows through you… there will always be someone better, faster, more awake, more aware, differently awake, etc. than you. Realizing this takes you out of that spiritual competitive mode, and that idea that you can purchase enlightenment.

Real awakening creates humility… a realization of how small and unimportant you really are. The aspirational community hates to hear this, because most of us come to spirituality to fill a sort of emptiness, a void of not feeling or sensing our own divinity and hunger to merge with divinity. Most people come to spirituality to feel big, to feel important, to recognize the Self as God. This certainly is true… we are all divine… we all are aspects of divinity… but we are also very small. I mention this because it is again a specific phase to look for in the awakening community– if the teacher does not show this or recognize this directly they are not as enlightened as they claim.

It is of vital importance to realize that becoming awake, enlightened, or having a kundalini awakening is not something that can be purchased simply because you want it. We can and should all become more awakened– meditating, doing yoga, reading, learning, visiting teachers and workshops. Meditating daily will change the life of anyone astronomically. But there are many things that are not under our direct control– despite what aspirational teachers and gurus want you to believe. Becoming a spiritual worker/shaman is one, becoming enlightened is one, having a kundalini awakening is one. We all have a spiritual path here. We can all consciously work to become less traumatized, to open our minds, our hearts, and our belief systems. We can consciously create compassion for one another, to hold multiple viewpoints and understand where they are coming from even if they are not in line with our own. But we should be happy with who and what we are. No need to aspire, no need to compete, no need to be the guru down the block. Real spiritual awakening is becoming as much and as fully who we are as we are able to within our lifetime. Discover who you are as an individual, be compassionate and love yourself, and realize that most of the books, the gurus, and the aspirational material out there is an illusion based on the ego-based, spiritually competitive and unrealized notion that kundalini or enlightenment can be bought and sold like a used car.

By the way, I do realize that it sounds contrary that I do work with people (yes, for a sliding scale fee) who are experiencing spiritual awakening, kundalini, and so forth. When we are awakening, especially when we are going through an intense awakening, we can all use tools to help us, understandings of what exactly is happening, and healing to help us work through the layers that are coming up. That is what I offer. My appointments are based on people currently having these experiences (non-aspirational) and are struggling with some element (or many elements) of it. I do so in an honest, ethical, and straight-forward manner and simply do not take people on who contact me that I am unable to help (for whatever reason) for any of my services. You can read more about my ethical practices that I abide by in my practice here